Do you ever wonder if your phone, tablet or computer actually help you to get things done or if they just get in the way?
I have been pondering this quite often over the past 6 months when real events occur that need my attention and which are emotionally draining. For example, when my Father died I didn’t turn to my phone to organise everything, I just kept it in my head or in a paper notebook and I find myself doing the same now.
Organising the care for my Mother, who recently suffered a stroke, and understanding what to do next cannot be quantified in a calendar app, a task list or with a few taps on a screen. Each move requires consideration, deep thought and lots of stress which I find to be heightened by making lists which are supposed to help.
For some reason I find that dealing with emotional issues in an analogue way fits and takes away some of the hassle, to the point that my phone is completely forgotten about for long periods of time.
Of course I need it to make calls, find numbers and do some research on matters new to me, but ultimately I find that stepping away from technology in times of massive stress is not a choice, it is just something I do.
It could well be that using technology each day adds stress to my life, but I tend to find that in everyday circumstances, it helps. I just wonder when the day will come that computers are clever enough to help us manage raw emotions and the stress that comes with them.
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McGST 
Hmmm. I haven’t found that in my life during stressful times. When my dad was sick I used my phone even more – especially for communication. That was 1995 when I was on a Treo. When my mom was sick and passed in 2015 I used my phone and iPad again for communication, but also for spreadsheets to track expenses and for research and also signing documents and manipulating pdfs. Even back to my Palm VII my wife and I used them to communicate and keep a log when her sister was in the hospital and passed.
I guess it’s all in how you view your devices and what you use them for.
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I guess I’m in between, but I really don’t think about it. Some things I write down and some things I just remember. One could argue that stressful times make it harder to remember things. One could also argue that the focus one has during stressful times makes it easier to remember things.
As for the technology, it’s there as a tool when needed. If I wasn’t using my calendar and to do list, I’d have a paper calendar and a bunch of notes. But that’s just me.
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Interesting thoughts Shaun.
I’m inclined to think some of it’s just the interaction modes. Stuff like entering into a digital datebook is very linear. Sometimes putting ink on paper opens up a 2D world, you can write things in different directions, use arrows to point back to previously written things, and generally use shape and layout to carry meaning in a way tapping into a virtual document generally can’t. (in the commercials for phablets that use a stylus, they point back to reclaiming some of this interaction on a screen, but while I dig my Apple Pencil and oversized iPad for some tasks, I haven’t gotten into seeing if as a full replacement — The virtualness of the interface gets in the way in a way that tearing off a sheet of graph paper from the pad I use as a drawing pad/mousepad doesn’t.
That flexibility may be more important when the emotional landscape is so fraught and jagged, it can accommodate the non-linearity of your thoughts in a way the cold and sterile apps can’t. Along with being ergonomically colder as well; glass and metal glowing screens flicking up pixels vs soft, sligthly yielding, gently reflective pages from a notebook gently absorbing ink…
I’m not sure if that explains all of the emotional response you’re experiencing, but maybe ties in?
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Curious I just ran into this article. My mother got really sick a couple years ago and yes, I setup a spreadsheet shared with my brothers so everyone could follow the events. It did work well and still does. But I now find myself tired of imputing all the stuff needed and sometimes tend to forget them as it causes stress just to see how much stuff you need to do. You know?… if you note everything down it gives you a sense of overload in life and that reflects on you. So… technology and pim fan can also be a problem. So… sometimes I try to go easy on tech. Kind of have to take vacations from tech things. Eventually I get back like work. But don’t get me wrong… I would be lost without evernote, email, shared docs, etc. I miss no appointment because of that. But it also causes stress that’s for sure.
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As a tangent on tools (and with the theme of how some make more stress than others) – I find “simplenote” a lot more relaxing than “evernote”, because it’s so much simpler, although a little more limited. (I use both, though, keeping work notes in Evernote and personal stuff in Simplenote)
What kind of stuff did you list in the spreadsheet, if it’s not too personal to ask?
I’ve had good luck with shared Google Docs for vacation planning – but a different, and overall much more congenial, kind of stress.
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… and hey… honestly I thought lostinmobile was out of business, but looks like you guys continue here. Great! Hope you all have a generous 2017! 🙂
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It’s Shaun’s world, we just comment on it 😀
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And this is one of the best comment threads I have ever seen. Some very deep thoughts which I shall steal for a future post:)
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My conversation buddy EB points out to that paper is permanent in a way the display of a gadget is not. That might be emotionally anchoring and reassuring at times when other things that seemed stationary and fixed in your life are shown to more vulnerable than you had fully realized.
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Reading through these reminded me of what I did when my parents passed. After all the basics were done and it was time to go through all the details, I mainly used paper lists. I’d make a long list of things I had to do and then grouped them by contact, like Service Canada, and then made one detailed sheet per contact. That way I could keep track of when I contacted each one, what happened, and whether nay followup was needed. I could have used my iPad with any number of apps or my Mac with any number of apps. The sheaf of paper gave everything a sense of immediacy. I could turn over a few sheets and get where I wanted. Or I could have two sheets in front of me at a time, such as the summary sheet and a detail sheet. In fact I still have them in my files just in case.
Now that may be because I grew up with paper but I have no problem using my iPhone and Mac for to do lists (as long as they’re synced).
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I guess this has a cousin in the classic “paper book vs kindle” decision, but is more fraught.
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Related but not directly. I use an iPad mini for ebooks and I usually read in bed before going to sleep. The strange thing is that last year I decided to finish a trilogy where I had read the first book a few years before. I tried to read the paperback I had and found it uncomfortable. So I bought the ebook so I could read with my iPad. I wonder how many others have migrated completely. But that’s a different discussion.
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